• Man kissing woman while sitting on railings during night
    Book Reviews,  Love Life

    The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts

    This book has been in print for 25 years, and the audio version for a good percentage of it. It has become an international phenomenon and has spawned numerous variations for specific sub-sets of people and now boasts an app with a quiz which you can share with your partner to find the best ways to communicate in your languages of love. This is a juggernaut of a book. I am not a psychologist and I respect the work that Gary Chapman has put in to distil years of clinical notes down into a pattern which emphasises 5 different ways we communicate love to each other and explains how we…

  • Rewrite the Past
    My Approach,  Journaling

    Rewriting Your Past – A Tool to Understand Yourself

    In her new book, Everything is Figureoutable, Marie Forleo presents a free writing exercise for 7 days which helps you figure out what you want in life. It’s a great and valuable exercise when you’re really not sure where you want to go, and I suggest you pick up a copy of the book and check it out (it’s at the end of Chapter 6). Free Writing vs Rewriting However, if you’re feeling stuck and think you might have some unconscious self-limiting beliefs which are holding you back, all the free writing in the world won’t help you overcome these blocks and let you hit the target that ignites your…

  • Emotional Life,  Character,  Quality of Life

    Finding my Authenticity: Breaking My Chains

    When I first had the idea for this blog I settled on the title “The Boy Who Forgot To Live” for the site. This is my journey from being a guy who was not happy with his situation in life – despite many on the outside thinking I “had it all” – to one where I would be very happy. That is still very true of the journey I am on and how I feel, though I changed the name just before launch to “Finding Authenticity” as this seemed more relevant and succinct for what I was doing and what so many others also seem to be seeking. I am…

  • Man shouting into a telephone
    Emotional Life

    Emotions are like clothes: We can choose the ones we wear.

    If you are pained by external things, it is not they that disturb you, but your own judgement of them. And it is in your power to wipe out that judgement now. Marcus Aurelius, Meditations I’ve been doing a lot of internal work this year, to understand myself at a deep level; my drives, my limiting beliefs, my conditioned framework, or as @Vishen says, the #Brules. You may have seen some of my book reviews on Twitter (or on this site) so have an idea of the breadth of material I have been absorbing. One thing I have understood is that our reaction to external events is our choice. I…